Good

Feeling good about ourselves can be difficult. Some days we just get up and feel spry and wonderful. Other days we just feel fat and dumpy. It could be changes in hormone levels or just the fact that we over ate the night before.

For some reason we have feel great in our favorite outfit and then our hair will be all wrong and then that blows the whole evening. Photos of myself make me cringe; it’s as if I never have a chin. It’s silly I know, and it could all be attributed to us being much too hard on ourselves.

When I get into my belly dance outfit and look at myself in the mirror all I see is the bad stuff that I hope and pray not one else is focusing in on. I don’t feel great or sexy or anything, just fat and dumpy. For some strange reason all of that goes out of my head when I am dancing. I really do love it and sort of going into a trance or other place and all of a sudden I don’t care and I just have fun. I know this is difficult to accomplish since I will be performing in front of people. Somehow I try to just focus on the dance and then I don’t care if someone thinks I’m fat in the audience.

Of course no one tells you that and people seem to like seeing me. It’s only when I am at home doing a dress rehearsal do I feel this way. I guess old baggage from my family and any insecurity I have just creeps in. My teacher and friends are so supportive and keep me thinking in a more positive way about myself. I don’t doubt my dancing skills; I have always been a good dancer. I just want to make sure everyone else thinks the same and not one wants to get up and leave during one of my performances.

If all else fails I will at least be able to say I had one heck of an outfit on! That should make even the most camera and stage shy person feel good about themselves. It sure helps me.